It’s time to REFUEL

BASECAMP is back this August. Sydney and Mountains.

I’ve been listening to the book, Pilgrim’s Progress by John Bunyan.

The story follows a man named Christian as he leaves the City of Destruction and journeys to a place called the Celestial City. Along the way he encounters all sorts of roadblocks and fearsome creatures along the way.

It has been a good reminder that as Christians we are pilgrims passing through this life and along the way we have opportunities to learn and grow. Also we have fellow pilgrims who travel with us to support and encourage us.

We hope this issue of REFUEL provides you with helpful resources for your pilgrimage to the Celestial City.  

LT Hopper

Read

Want to quit watching porn? If you have a porn habit but want to quit, you’re not alone. Here are some tips that will start recovering. How to quit watching porn today.

Eternity News shares Five tips to keep young people in church.

Question: Which of these factors stand out to you? Reply and let us know.

Men have fewer friends these days, which can hurt their well-being. Here are expert tips for fostering those relationships.

Question: what have you learned about building relationships with other men? Reply and let us know.

One of the core arguments against the historicity of the Bible and the flood account in Genesis by scientists has been that a global flood is impossible because there simply is not enough water on earth to flood the entire thing. But…scientists discover massive ‘ocean’ beneath Earth’s surface bigger than all the seas above land.

Reflect

From Andrew J. Bauman:

A good and safe man is self-aware. He knows his story, his wounds, and how they impact his relationships. He has done the hard work of becoming an honest and authentic man.

Second, he is aware of safety. He knows when he is not acting safe and removes himself from the situation and self-regulates. He knows when he is triggered and adjusts to make sure he is providing safety to his partner and anyone he is in a relationship with.

Third, a good and safe man knows the difference between anger and aggression and has learned how to fight clean. He is self-controlled and centered. He does not fly off the handle and rage; he names his anger without being violent.

Fourth, he is aware of how he impacts others. He can now see the other and be more emotionally present while remaining kind in the midst of conflict or high tension. He is no longer selfish and self-centered. He understands his impact and the weight of his action or inaction on those he has relationships with.

Fifth is kindness—both to self and to others. He is no longer ruled by self-contempt or other-centered contempt. He is not necessarily just a “nice” man, but a kind man. Normally, you can see the kindness in his eyes. Kindness is also not something that is easily attained. Kindness towards self and others grows after the hard emotional story work of dealing with heartache and trauma. You cannot be an insecure man and a kind man.

Finally, the last category is that of security. The good and safe man is secure in himself. He is consistent and not easily threatened or jealous. He knows who he is and knows why he is here. He has purpose and meaning outside of his relationship with his partner. He knows his “calling” and where he is going.

I want to close with a blessing to the man who is on the journey of healing, whether you are just beginning or are already years into this painful journey toward wholeness. This is my prayer for you.

“Men, God believes in you, more than you believe in God. May you have the courage and integrity to believe in yourself. You have what it takes to be a good and safe man. But know that your healing will come at a cost. Surrender hurts. Loosen your grip, release control, and feel what is evoked in you. Feel the fear. Weep. You are not defined by past trauma, your present failures, or your violence. You must take responsibility and accept the consequences of your actions. You must own your adolescent behavior for you can move beyond it. Step into who God already sees you to be. Humility is strength and repentance is kindness; may you embrace both.”

Sing

Come Jesus come. Let today be the day.

Pray

A prayer for our leaders by John Flavel:

Lord, cleanse our churches, and repair their walls, so they may become gardens of delight for Christ to walk in and take pleasure in. May her ministers be faithful and wise: faithful so they do not deceive others; wise so they do not deceive themselves. May their wisdom prevent deceivers imposing on them, and their faithfulness prevent them imposing on others. May their wisdom enable them to discern wholesome food for the flock and their faithfulness oblige them to distribute it.

May our leaders be pure with spiritual aims and intentions; serving not their own honour and interest, but yours.

May our leaders show sincerity, not appearing outwardly spiritual while being inwardly carnal.

May our leaders be diligent, like men in harvest, like women in labour, like soldiers in battle, watching while others sleep.

May our leaders lack favouritism, as those who will appear before an impartial God. May they take the same care, manifest the same love, show the same diligence to the poorest and weakest souls in their care as they do the rich, the great and the honourable. For all souls are rated the same in your book of life, and our Redeemer paid as much for one as the other.

May their faithfulness fix their eyes on the right end, and may their wisdom direct them to the best means of attaining it. May they lay a good foundation of knowledge in our souls, choosing subjects that will meet our needs, shaping the language in which they address us, using their own affections to move us, being careful of their behaviour. Send them often to their knees to seek your blessing upon their labours, knowing that all their success entirely depends upon you.

Amen.

Explore

Fasting is a way to get the teachings of Jesus into our body — our whole person — so that we can live close to the presence of the Father, like Jesus did. Watch how Stephanie and Wes have used fasting to walk more closely with God.

Smile

Respond

Send us your response and let us know:

Which of this month’s resources was most helpful for you?

Refuel is a monthly email with resources to help you live well as a Christian man. It is connected to BASECAMP Men’s Conference — a ministry of Katoomba Christian Convention (KCC).